Be afraid, be very afraid.

How much of our lives are spent in fear? It’s something I’ve thought a lot about over the past few months.

Fear is a horrible thing. It’s used as justification in really bad decision making, whether on the personal level, a societal level, a species level. The self preservation instinct is based somewhat upon fear and that’s something you’d have a lot of trouble casting aspersions on but, when you get right down to it more often than not being afraid seldom is helpful.

The reason I bring the subject up is because I’ve come to realize I’ve spent a majority of my life being afraid of one thing or another.

I remember there was a friend I use to house sit for two decades back. I loved being able to house sit if only to get out of the crappy space I was living in at the time. The only thing I found very disarming was this painting he had done which hung prominently in the living room. It was a birds’ eye view of a small boy walking alone through an alley. It had very dramatic perspective but, the unsettling thing I found looking at it was the expression on the boy’s face.

It was a combination of sadness and fear.

The funny thing was, the painting always felt to be more an accident than anything else, I never attributed the ability or skill to my friend to capture the particular emotion so vividly. No, it was more a matter about what I brought to the table, emotional baggage. The results of a hard journey through life so, when I looked at the painting, saw the expression upon the boy’s face, it made me uncomfortable because I knew the feelings behind it all too well. The isolation etched in those features, the horror felt so deeply it seemed to ooze from his pores.

Anyway, being in a bit of an introspective phase and having to deal with quite a few crises over the last few months have made me focus on the direction I would like life to take. At least that is part of what goes in in my quieter moments. The thing I realize I want more than anything as I move forward through life is to stop being afraid, to stop allowing fear to consume or paralyze me. To vanquish the fear within me and really enjoy each day to its fullest.

Everybody’s life would be a bit better with a little less fear, case in point:

acarophobia fear of itching or of insects causing itching
acrophobia fear of heights
aerophobia fear of flying or draughts
agoraphobia fear of open spaces
agyiophobia fear of crossing busy streets
aichmophobia fear of sharp or pointed objects
ailurophobia fear of cats
algophobia fear of pain
amathophobia fear of dust
amaxophobia fear of riding in a car
ambulophobia fear of walking
anglophobia fear of England or the English
anthrophobia fear of humans
anuptaphobia fear of staying single
aquaphobia fear of water
arachibutyrophobia fear of peanut butter sticking to roof of mouth
arachnophobia fear of spiders
astraphobia fear of being struck by lightning
astrapophobia fear of thunder and lightning
automysophobia fear of being dirty
autophobia fear of solitude
ballistophobia fear of missiles
bathophobia fear of falling from a high place
batophobia fear of heights or being close to tall buildings
batrachophobia fear of frogs and toads
belonephobia fear of pins and needles
bibliophobia fear of books
blennophobia fear of slime
brontophobia fear of thunder and lightning
cancerophobia fear of cancer
cathisophobia fear of sitting
cenophobia fear of empty spaces
chrematophobia fear of money
cibophobia fear of or distaste for food
claustrophobia fear of closed spaces
climacophobia fear of falling down stairs
clinophobia fear of staying in bed
cremnophobia fear of cliffs and precipices
cyberphobia fear of computers
cynophobia fear of dogs
dromophobia fear of crossing streets
dysmorphophobia fear of physical deformities
ecophobia fear of home
eleutherophobia fear of freedom
eosophobia fear of dawn
ergasiophobia fear of work
ergophobia fear of work
erotophobia fear of sex
erythrophobia fear of red lights or of blushing
euphobia fear of good news
Francophobia fear of France or the French
gallophobia fear of France or the French
gamophobia fear of marriage
geniophobia fear of chins
genophobia fear of sex
gerascophobia fear of growing old
graphophobia fear of writing
gymnophobia fear of nudity
heliophobia fear of sunlight
herpetophobia fear of snakes
hierophobia fear of sacred things
homichlophobia fear of fog
homophobia fear of homosexuals
hydrophobia fear of water
hypsophobia fear of high places
iatrophobia fear of going to the doctor
iconophobia fear or hatred of images
kainotophobia fear of change
kakorrhaphiophobia fear of failure
kenophobia fear of empty spaces
ligyrophobia fear of loud noises
linonophobia fear of string
lygophobia fear of darkness
lyssophobia fear of hydrophobia
macrophobia fear of prolonged waiting
metrophobia fear of poetry
monophobia fear of being alone
muriphobia fear of mice
myophobia fear of mice
mysophobia fear of contamination or dirt
nebulaphobia fear of fog
necrophobia fear of corpses
negrophobia fear of blacks
neophobia fear of novelty
nosophobia fear of disease
novercaphobia fear of one's stepmother
nyctophobia fear of the night or darkness
ochlophobia fear of crowds
oenophobia fear or hatred of wine
ombrophobia fear of rain
onomatophobia fear of hearing a certain word
ophidiophobia fear of snakes
ophthalmophobia fear of being stared at
optophobia fear of opening one’s eyes
ornithophobia fear of birds
paedophobia fear of children; fear of dolls
panophobia melancholia marked by groundless fears
pantophobia fear of everything
parthophobia fear of virgins
pathophobia fear of disease
pediculophobia fear of lice
pentheraphobia fear or hatred of one’s mother-in-law
phagophobia fear of eating
phengophobia fear of daylight
phonophobia fear of noise or of speaking aloud
photophobia fear of light
pogonophobia fear of beards
psychrophobia fear of the cold
pteronophobia fear of being tickled by feathers
pyrophobia fear of fire
Russophobia fear of Russia or Russians
satanophobia fear of the devil
sciaphobia fear of shadows
scopophobia fear of being looked at
scoptophobia fear of being looked at
scotophobia fear of the dark
sitiophobia fear of food
sitophobia fear of food or eating
spectrophobia fear of looking in a mirror
symmetrophobia fear of symmetry
syphilophobia fear of syphilis
taphephobia fear of being buried alive
technophobia fear of technology
thalassophobia fear of the sea
thanatophobia fear of death
theophobia fear of God
tocophobia fear of pregnancy or childbirth
tonitrophobia fear of thunder
topophobia fear of performing; fear of certain places
toxicophobia fear of poisoning
toxiphobia fear of poison or being poisoned
triskaidekaphobia fear of the number thirteen
uranophobia fear of heaven
xenophobia fear of foreigners
zelophobia fear of jealousy
zoophobia fear of animals